The Power of Female Friendship

When I reflect on the most significant people in my life, I think of the strong, loving women I’m fortunate to have as family and friends. A part of my emotional and mental resilience is rooted from the deep bonds I’ve formed with them. I want to take a moment to say thank you to the beautiful women who have been a guiding light in my life. Lauren, Holly, Thalia, and Amanda, you have saved me during times when I lost my way and needed direction. The reason I can allow myself to fall at times is because I know that you are always there to catch me. Thank you for being the incredible women you are and for always standing by my side even during the most trying of times and challenging circumstances that have arose. I want each of you to know how grateful I am for your presence, love, and unwavering support.

I didn’t always have the best of luck making friends when I was younger. When I was a teenager, I had a falling out with a few of my best girlfriends at the time. It affected me immensely for years to come in my adulthood. I felt that I was unworthy of forming strong, trusting friendships. I had so much fear around being accepted and judged. For several years I steered clear of making friends because the thought of losing someone I cared about dearly would only reaffirm the feelings I felt when I was younger. Learning how to let go of the fear of being forgotten is something I struggled with for a while. Don’t get me wrong, I still have my moments when I get triggered by someone or something and those feelings start to rise again. It’s crazy to think that when we experience something traumatic at a young age it can still creep up and haunt you into adulthood. It took ending a five-year relationship with my boyfriend for me to realize the significance of having strong female friendships in my life. I crumbled… literally to the floor and had no one except my sister Holly and my cousin Lauren to help me pick up the pieces. It was during that time I realized how valuable having friends is. I’m extremely grateful that I had Holly and Lauren to lean on, because if I didn’t who knows if I would’ve had the courage to really walk away from that relationship. I had to finally surrender and open myself up again. It’s terrifying being vulnerable and letting people in because the feeling of loss is painful, but missing out on the ability to love and experience joy is far worse. I’m proud of myself for opening my heart up again and forming forever friendships. I wouldn’t be where I am without Lauren, Holly, Thalia, and Amanda.

Lauren, you have been my absolute rock and dearest friend through every storm I’ve weathered. You’re the most self-less person I know, and your ability to stand tall when the going gets tough is my favorite thing about you. I consider you my sister, and you are my favorite person in the whole world. You make me laugh harder than anyone else on the planet. This life would not be the same without your comedic relief, so thank you for always making me smile. We’ve traveled the world together and watched each other tackle our adversities and thrive through it. I remember the weekend my boyfriend and I broke up, I called and asked if I could spend the weekend with you at your dorm, and without hesitation, you welcomed me with open arms as you always do. I can’t even begin to describe to you what that did for me. You showed up when I needed someone the most. I remember we went to your on-campus gym every day, prank called, and looted Marshall’s. Even though that weekend sounds so simple it was pivotal in making me truly understand the depth of what true, healthy love feels like. It doesn’t matter whether it’s romantic love or friend love, it should feel easy, you should feel supported, and above all you should feel like you matter. I will always be your biggest cheerleader. You’re smart, witty and fucking hilarious. I love you, Lauren.

Holly, you have been an incredible sister. You help me stay accountable for my decisions and have supported me through every tough phase of life. Your genuine, wise, kind spirit has been a guiding light for me. I feel extremely grateful to have you as my big sister. I know no matter what life throws my way you’re always going to be there to hold my hand. I look up to you in so many ways. Your ability to write and express yourself freely takes courage, and it inspires me to do the same. My favorite thing to do with you is laugh so hard that we end up crawling on the floor like wounded warriors. It’s hard to pick a standout moment because we’re constantly laughing. Even though we can get on each other’s nerves at times or occasionally steal each other’s clothes, there’s no other person in the world I can imagine being my big sister. I love you, Holly.

Thalia, you have been the most radiant friend I’ve ever had. I love it when you call me on the phone and the first thing you say is “Courtneyyyy,” with so much enthusiasm. It warms my heart and makes me feel wonderful to know that you get so excited to hear from me. We’ve known each other since we were young girls and became even closer in adulthood. We rekindled at a time when we both really needed each other. We were going through similar experiences, and it felt good to have a friend who could level with me and understand what I was going through. You helped me open my heart up to the possibility that genuine, loving friendships do exist. I can't thank you enough for being like a sister to me and for never judging me, even when I felt overwhelmed by guilt. I think of you as my little fairy. You’re the cutest person I know, with a vibrant energy that's truly magnetic. It’s exciting to think about what the future holds for our friendship. I will always be there for you no matter the circumstance. I love you, Thalia.

Amanda, you are the wisest friend I have. You push me to be vulnerable and have an open heart. You encourage me to live a life full of love and compassion. Whenever I come to you with a hardship, you’re always there to offer advice and moral support. Without a shadow of a doubt, I know I can always rely on you to make me feel at ease and comforted when I’m not feeling my best. You give so much to people without ever expecting anything in return. Every time we spend time together, I feel like I’m instantly in a state of peace. Your presence makes me feel safe, I never have to question who I am when I’m with you. The most beautiful part of our friendship is that we’re comfortable with each other enough to express how we feel and make sure that the other person always feels supported. It’s amazing that we’ve stuck by each other for so long, and how our friendship continues to blossom. It makes me happy to know that you’ll always be a part of my life. You are like a sister to me, and always will be. I love you, Amanda.

I am incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by such beautiful, strong, intelligent women. Thank you to every single girlfriend I’ve made along the way. I’ve been so fortunate to make good friends at home and in London, which is home away from home for me. I cherish each of you deeply and look forward to many more years of shared moments and unbreakable bonds. The power of female friendship is real.

With all my love,

Courtney.